the end of the world
30 Jun 2006 Thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday this week....
I'm not sure what to write anymore.
All my energy, inspiration and strength is drained. For the past 2 weeks, I've pushed myself to finish a number of projects that were on my todolist. The results are nice. I setup 5 totally new servers, and replaced 4 others with new hardware.
At this very moment, I'm looking at the setup of the last machine. The last item on my todo-list.
I could probably finish it today, but I'm overwhelmed by some kind of loss.
I planned 7 weeks of holidays, which start in about 8 hours. And I wonder what happens when I finish my todo-list. What's beyond that ridge ?
There's a place I come by often, a road which goes over a hill. When I cycle towards it, it looks like I've reached the end of the world. It's a nice view...
In many ways, I'll reach the end of the world in 8 hours. Let's hope the view is equally nice.
About 3 weeks ago, 2 girls disappeared in the south of Belgium. A couple days ago, they were found: strangled and dumped in a sewer. The preliminary report suggests that at least one of them was raped.
I've always believed in a clean and just society, one where people can live happily in peace and everyone is safe. My opinions on freedom, democracy, justice and other aspects of society are very strong and often debated. At this point though, I find my beliefs shattered. Perhaps the perfect society is utopian. Maybe violence and injustice are an integral part of mankind.
Unlike in movies, the good guys (and girls) hardly ever win in real life. Good and bad are not in balance. Efforts to fight evil seem so pointless... Personally, I wonder what the harm would be if I just gave up. Maybe I care too much about the bigger view. Maybe I should be like everyone else: live your own life and be happy not knowing about the dirt. How our freedom is being taken away a piece at the time, our democracy is turning into a TV-show and the feeling of security is nanometers away from being a bad joke.
Ignorance is bliss.
"Cry havoc, and let slip the dogs of war"